Kumquat Cultivation for Fun or Profit

Have you ever considered growing kumquats? If you are interested in cultivating kumquats, either at home, or commercially, you've come to the right place. While living in Saint Martinville, Louisianna, a tiny town about 140 miles west of New Orleans --I should mention that Saint Martinville is also known as "le petit Paris," I had a small grouping of kumquat trees in my front yard. In the morning I would sit out front and sip my chicory coffee. After breakfast I would stroll over and pluck a bushel of kumquats on which to snack during my workday advising residents in the French Quarter on historic preservation.
So let me tell you, the key to choosing the perfect kumquat variety is not only looking at your climate, but also at your intended use. For instance, Citrus crassifolia, also known as Fortunella crassifolia is generally consumed raw with its skin still on. On the other hand, Citrus japonica (also known called Fortunella japonica, Citrus margarita, and Fortunella margarita) is typically peeled, and some prefer to cook it, rather than eat it raw. There are, or course, other varieties of the fruit, but these are my two favorites. You may also wish to consider hybrid fruits, as kumquats readily hybridize with other citrus fruits. Such hybrids are known as Citrofortunella. Examples of Citrofortunella include the limequat, orangequat, and calamondin. Some quite enjoy these varieties. Personally, I do not care for them, and I discourage you from growing them because I do not think they will market well.

-Hillman

Investing in Retail in the Ukraine

Do you know where a great place to open a store would be?

Of course you don't!

You're probably from Iowa, or Oklahoma, or some other place I've never been but that I instinctively know just sucks.

It sucks where you were born!

I'm better than you because I wasn't born there!

You people are funny!

The Ukraine's Global Retail Development Index is through the roof!

Why haven't you invested there yet?

I invested there like 5 years ago, and that's where I got the money to buy my second house.

God, you people are pathetic. Go back to Idaho already.

-Poo Poo

Victoria's Secret? When She's Open!

During my stint in Paris I briefly found myself the owner of an upscale women's lingerie boutique. As you can imagine, we primarily catered to a very high-class clientele. I feel, therefore, extremely qualified to speak on this subject. First, let me say that I find Victoria's Secret windows to simply look slutty. I mean, a woman wants to feel attractive and special when she wears lingerie, not like she looks cheap. Plus, have you looked at their website recently? They expect you to actually call to get the hours each branch is open. I mean honestly, I just can't feel sorry for any business that fails if they can't event be bothered to post their hours on their website! I walked by the other evening, say 10pm, after catching a movie and they weren't open. But how was I to know this? People, I like Victoria's Secret. In fact I like it very much considering that I'm a gay man. I want them to do well and succeed, but they have to want to succeed, and they have to be willing to work for it.

-Hillman